The alarm clock wakes you up far too early. When you finally scramble out of bed, calculating the remaining minutes to get ready for work or school, you run into the kitchen still fixing your hair, grab your lunch from the refrigerator, and maybe snatch up a piece of toast.
You rush breathlessly out of the door. Your mind is fully occupied throughout the day. You come home and gobble down supper because you have an appointment in the evening, or you have to study. You are so exhausted by the time your body makes contact with the mattress that you don’t have the energy to reflect on the day. And you are about to go through the same process again in a few short hours. “So,” you ask yourself, “what is life all about?”
As a child, I enjoyed learning Bible stories in Sunday school, but I didn’t necessarily look forward to the Sunday night gospel service because it made me feel uncomfortable. The speaker would show from the Bible that, “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3: 23) and that “God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5: 8).
Despite hearing about my sin and God’s cure for sin, I continued thinking that I was just a kid and my sins weren’t really that bad. However, when I was about eight years old, my great-grandfather died. As I stood looking at him in the casket, I realized that he was in Heaven but I was still not ready to meet God. That bothered me briefly. Then I forgot about it as I “tried” on my own to stop sinning.
One day, the school bus was rolling to a stop to drop my family off near our house. We were standing on the stairs ready to step off, when the bus driver slammed the door shut on my sister’s legs. That sent us all crashing backwards on top of each other. The bus driver had seen in time what we hadn’t. A neighbour hadn’t realized the bus was stopping, so to avoid crashing his truck into the back of the bus, he made a dash for the shoulder and the ditch. He was coming up quickly right along the side of the bus where we were intending to step out. The truck hit a culvert right beside the bus door. The shock was terrible. The man climbed out of his truck with blood running down his face, in his beard, and on his hands. We went home in tears realizing our narrow escape. God was reminding me that I was a step away from death.
While coming home from the evening service, I managed to hear my parents’ conversation in the front seat. Apparently, in the local paper there were dates predicting the return of the Lord Jesus for the Christians (those who already had their sins forgiven). I was scared! So, I asked them if it was true. They assured me that the Son of Man (Jesus) is coming at an hour you do not expect (Luke 12: 40). However, it was enough to make me more serious about preparing to meet God. I was 12 years-old, I didn’t want to be left alone on earth when Jesus returned. That night I stayed up late reading verses in my Bible and pamphlets about God’s free gift of salvation, but I was still trying to do something so that God would say, “Good job! You can come to Heaven because you have earned it.”
I finally fell asleep, having tried many times to work to get to Heaven. In the morning, I found my mom brushing my sister’s hair. Jeanette told me with a big smile that the night before she had accepted God’s gift of the forgiveness of her sins. She was ready and I wasn’t!
That day, I didn’t go to school but instead read my Bible. I read the last part of Romans 5: 6 “Christ died for the ungodly”. For the first time in my life, I saw myself as the ungodly sinner. I got down on my knees and begged God to forgive me for my wicked sins and I thanked Him for sending Jesus to pay the bill for my sins with His blood. It was amazing to no longer feel burdened about my sins.
God is waiting for you too. He wants to give you the peace and purpose that I have found. Will you ask Him to forgive you for your sins from the past, present and the future, and enjoy a new life with purpose? The Bible says, “And the one who comes to Me I will by no means cast out” (John 6: 37).
Emily McCandless
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